Good food, fine wine and some intimate conversation: romance is is good for you, according to a Vancouver Island couples’ therapist. Image: Facebook/Quails’ Gate Estate Winery

Romance is more than fun, it’s good for you

Find out not just how to keep those Valentine’s Day fires burning, but why

Romance in a relationship is important, not just on Valentine’s Day but everyday, says registered psychotherapist John Taylor.

Taylor, counsellor at Izumi Therapy in Nanaimo, said making time for a partner is probably the healthiest thing couples can do for their relationship and well-being.

“We talk about the importance of eating healthy and exercising but there’s some research that says 15 minutes of working on your relationship a day would do more for your cardiovascular health than an hour of aerobic activity at the gym because you get rid of all the stress hormones that are so bad for you,” Taylor said.

RELATED: Vancouver Island retailers share the love around Valentine’s Day

Taylor added that romance is something that people should add everyday to their relationship.

“Add as much as you can,” he said.

Taylor said every positive act couples do for each other in a relationship is romance.

“The difference between a romantic relationship and a friendship is that you realize and recognize your partners vulnerabilities and what they need to fill them up and you kind of go that extra level to meet those,” he said.

According to the online blog, Health Fitness Revolution, romantic relationships can be a ticket to good health.

In a post about the connection between health and romance, the author writes that there are chemical processes in the brain that affect how we feel. When we’re with a significant other, the body releases hormones, like oxytocin and dopamine, that signal feelings of trust, pleasure, and reward.

It states that “In one study, researchers found people’s blood pressure was lower when they were with a romantic partner than when they were interacting with anyone else.”

Taylor said one of the best ways to strengthen an emotional connection with a partner is to be an empathetic listener.

“If your partner gets home and says ‘I can’t believe my boss yelled at me, I was five minutes late for work.’ You don’t say, ‘well of course you were late you didn’t get up.’ You have empathy and say ‘that’s really tough tell me about it,’” he said.

If the emotional stuff is working well, Taylor said other aspects in a relationship become easier. He said it’s important to have both sexual and non-sexual connections but that an emotional component should come first.

Valentine’s Day can be a day for couples to be extra romantic, but Taylor said it can also be a difficult day for couples who have little romance in their relationships.

“The expectation is too unrealistic for the day to fix it,” he said. “A good relationship means the job is important and the kids are important but we’re important too. The importance of a couple putting [making time for each other] in their schedule and making time everyday is just as important as getting to work on time,” Taylor said.

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

Surrey bus driver tests positive for COVID-19

Routes he drove have not been disclosed

Surrey mayor denies property tax deferral motion

Councillor’s notice of motion for Surrey property taxes to be deferred until Dec. 2 out of order

Team refunds OK’d for cancelled Surrey Mayor’s Cup soccer tournament

The decision follows the amalgamation of the Central City Breakers club with Surrey Football Club

COVID-19: 4 new deaths, 25 new cases but only in Vancouver Coastal, Fraser Health

A total of 1,291 people have tested positive for the novel coronavirus

COVID-19: Don’t get away for Easter weekend, Dr. Bonnie Henry warns

John Horgan, Adrian Dix call 130 faith leaders as holidays approach

COVID-19: Trudeau says 30K ventilators on the way; 3.6M Canadians claim benefits

Canada has seen more than 17,000 cases and at least 345 deaths due to COVID-19

RCMP call on kids to name latest foal recruits

The baby horses names are to start with the letter ‘S’

As Canadians return home amid pandemic, border crossings dip to just 5% of usual traffic

Non-commercial land crossing dipped by 95%, air travel dropped by 96 per cent, according to the CBSA

Logan Boulet Effect: Green Shirt Day calls on Canadians to become organ donors

While social distancing, the day also honours the 16 lives lost in the 2018 Humboldt Broncos Crash

COMMENTARY: Knowing where COVID-19 cases are does not protect you

Dr. Bonnie Henry explains why B.C. withholds community names

B.C. wide burning restrictions come into effect April 16

‘Larger open burns pose an unnecessary risk and could detract from wildfire detection’

B.C. secures motel, hotel rooms for COVID-19 shelter space

Community centres, rooms reserved for pandemic self-isolation

Most Read